Voice: For many politicians, dealing with a crisis makes their day

February 02, 2001

It's apparently easy for statements from radicals to be misunderstood. And that may be an understatement. And the proper one is — who can understand a statement like "Balancing the budget and setting the tax rates accordingly?" It's so strange.

Maybe it will help in my mock campaign for president if I'm not so academic. I coined the world "frantacide" the other day in order to describe my impressions of "The West Wing" TV series. It means egocentric, savior-oriented politicians running around like a bunch of chickens with their heads cut off. At the local level they used to call them "flaming ducks."

Dealing with a crisis seems to "make the day" of many a politician. And I've often wondered if there was no fire, if they'd run out and set one.

So it is that "being up to your neck in alligators and having no time to drain the swamp" can become a way of life (a Linus blanket).


But more to the point, now we have the "crisis" of a surplus wherein.

(1) The liberals can play Santa Claus proposing new programs, and

(2) The conservatives can play Santa Claus proposing lower taxes.

The smoke and mirrors that were used to "discover the surplus" was so onerous, I understand that a picture of these Santa Claus types can be found in the rogues gallery wearing a white starched collar. The sign under the mug shots read: "con of the year." Therefore, my proposal to balance the budget and set the tax rates accordingly is actually an anti-crime measure.

And, Virginia, these political Santa Clauses are impostors of an ilk much worse than any Robin Hood. They are not the real thing.

My platform is to have no more or less government than necessary. With those policies in place, a surplus constitutes fund balance, available. And the tax rates would be lowered accordingly.

In Hawaii, they would point out the eucalyptus tree and say: We call it the IRS tree — "you-clipped-us." Based on my plan, if you get "clipped" one year you get it back the next … and without the help of politicos playing Santa Claus.


El Centro

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