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Voice: Kofford, his literary hero, selling out with dogs ad

September 22, 2001

Mr. Kofford: Just when I think that you cannot let me down, you go out and do just that! And to think that I stand up for you when no one else does. To think that

I use your column, "Life Out Here" in my classroom as much as the required texts. And especially after I pioneered a mob of English majors to petition San Diego State University-Imperial Valley campus to keep you on their staff.

It wasn't because we love you, but because we need you! But seeing your face being French-kissed by your pooches disappoints me and a small tribe of followers. This desperate need for attention is not your style, Bret. Leave this for all the Mariah Careys out there.

Whenever I see that picture, I'm thinking SELLOUT! And to think that you inspire me to be a better writer. You, Mr. Kofford, have taught me to walk on that edge, to be honest and to make my voice be heard.

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You have inspired me to start two coalitions that will be on-line soon. First there is DUMB (Daddies Against Moronic Behavior), where we prey on lazy and illiterate parents who park in red zones, under "no parking zones," in front of schools. And we wonder why our children do not have any respect for the law. My second coalition, HAN (Husbands Against None), is more of a support group for "constipated" husbands.

Mr. Kofford, help me, help you. You are my Forrest Gump, marathoning around the Imperial Valley and I am your humble shadow. What am I supposed to do when you do not want to run anymore?

Mr. Kofford, Bret: You are not keeping it real!

CHARLIE ZAMARRIPA

Calexico

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